I was just thinking this morning.....about writing about my self....how I don't really like to do that...thinking "who likes to read about an old woman and what she thinks". I prefer to write about other people, because I find people so very interesting. I always meet someone and I think "I bet he has a story to tell". And if I ask questions, I find out it true!
Well, this morning I find myself feeling old and decrepit! I hate so say it, but it is true. I will write about this one time, and that is it, because I don't want to talk about it anymore. I hate to complain about my ailments to anyone. I complain to God. Who wants to hear someone go on and on about their ailments. Seems like old people do that a lot. I am old. But I think young! So there. When I get this out of my system, I will feel better just writing it.
My bones ache and I feel pain when I walk, get up, or down, and I can't walk far, and I can't walk up a hill, even a small hill, with fear of falling, and when I go to the basketball games with Bob, someone has to help me climb the bleachers, but only 3 or 4 rows. I mean it takes Bob and some other helpful man, to help me up and help me down later. I hate that. My knees are so weak, I can't get up out of a low chair by myself. It is a pitiful way to live. So I think my days are limited to keep going to the games. Unless God heals me.It is better to stay home.
I can't cook meals like I used to, because after about 30 minutes in the kitchen, my back hurts so bad, and my hip and my knees get weak. So I have to go sit down, before I fall!
So that is the way it is. So when I went to Dr. Frye about a month ago, with Julie, I asked her about my pain, and she gave me a steroid shot in my right hip. My right thigh/leg was hurting so bad I could hardly walk. It helped for about 2 days and the pain was back..I called her and asked if she thought a chiropractor would help, and she wanted me to have complete x rays done the hospital. I did, and so she sent them to Dr. Krause my Orthopedic doctor to look at, and Wednesday I went to him. But the pain has eased somewhat. Thank God. He is sooo nice! He also was the doctor who operated on Julie's hip.
Well, it appears I have arthritis in all my bones. My right hip especially, which has been causing all my pain in my right leg, and my spine...arthritis in my spine, also I have a little bit of what they curvature of the spine. That explains why my back hurts so much, even after sleeping all night in a comfortable pillow top bed. When I get up in the morning, my back is in so much pain, I can hardly walk. OMY! I feel ancient. I makes me want to cry!
So he recommended an injection in my hip in the bone. Next Monday I get it at the hospital radiologist.
I hope it works this time. I think it is a steroid.
I have been praying for God to heal me. I know God healed the pain in my hands which are ugly and gnarled with arthritis ...they looks bad...but there is no pain in my hands Praise God! I can still type! Thank God because I love my computer. It is my best friend.
Another thing happened last night. To Julie. She fell while walking through the living room. She just lost her balance. I was in the kitchen and looked up to see her lose her balance and fall. Thank goodness, she fell over the little leather hassock, and did not hurt herself. She slid down to the floor. But of course I could not get her up. I couldn't get my neighbors on the phone, and could not get Pastor Bennie or Pastor Jeanette on the phone. Finally I called Rocio and Pablo who live out in the country and Pablo and his daughter Damariz came into town and helped Julie up. It only took them about 15 minutes to get here. If they couldn't come I was going to call Bob and Debbie to come to town to help me. They live about 15 minutes from here too.
That was my night last night. I am so frustrated that I can't do things like I used to. I hate being old. But I thank God he is still in the healing business, and I will be healed, because He has already healed me, it just has not been manifested yet.
Today I have asked Rocio to come stay with Julie, while I get a manicure from Ashley. I always am uplifted and happy, after I go to my "Steel Magnolias Beauty Shop" and are with Ashey and Sylivia and all the nice ladies that I happen to see there every week. That is the extent of my social life. It is wonderful!
Friday, December 12, 2014
Monday, September 8, 2014
Sept. in South Texas, North Texas, and being a sanctuary for the Lord.
I was just thinking this morning about how much I love September....and October...and November....especially in South Texas...because truthfully, I would rather be in North Texas...especially during the summer and fall.
I lived in North Texas almost half my life. don't find the colors of the trees turning as much down in South Texas. As you do in North Texas. Mesquite trees don't turn ...they just die and turn yellow and not a very pretty yellow, then fall off. They say as long as the mesquites are green autumn - is still far away.
But here I am back in S. Texas, back to my roots. Back to where it all began for me. So even though I prefer North Texas, this is where I ended up. This is where God wanted me. So I decided to just "bloom where I was planted". Make the best of my circumstances. The main thing I miss is having a good friend to hang around with, pray with, go places with, someone who has the same thoughts and desires and will listen as I talk, and we can tell each other things, and we know the things that are private, will stay with only us.
But I am so happy I have pastors I can talk to. And I have God who I know hears me, and I can hear Him when I listen.
I decided on Sept. 1 that I am going to spend time with the Lord every morning like I used to. First thing I do when I get up, is get me a cup of coffee, then go to my hiding place, my office right now...and before I turn my phone on, before I go to my computer, I don't even play music. I just sit quietly for a short time, like 10 minutes and meditate on God and try to think Good Things. Then I open my bible and read some scriptures: I am reading Psalm 101 through Psalm 130 this month. I study that Psalm for a time, dissecting it through and through. To see if I get anything specifically from God. And I do every morning!
At least I feel better! After 2 hours of sitting, reading, listening, and talking to the Lord, I am ready to get to my computer, play some music, and read my email and see what Facebook has to offer from my FB friends.
Hallelujah, I love Mondays....and the word I got yesterday was "believe" and "on the 3rd day you will get some good news".
I want to be a sanctuary for people and for God.
I lived in North Texas almost half my life. don't find the colors of the trees turning as much down in South Texas. As you do in North Texas. Mesquite trees don't turn ...they just die and turn yellow and not a very pretty yellow, then fall off. They say as long as the mesquites are green autumn - is still far away.
But here I am back in S. Texas, back to my roots. Back to where it all began for me. So even though I prefer North Texas, this is where I ended up. This is where God wanted me. So I decided to just "bloom where I was planted". Make the best of my circumstances. The main thing I miss is having a good friend to hang around with, pray with, go places with, someone who has the same thoughts and desires and will listen as I talk, and we can tell each other things, and we know the things that are private, will stay with only us.
But I am so happy I have pastors I can talk to. And I have God who I know hears me, and I can hear Him when I listen.
I decided on Sept. 1 that I am going to spend time with the Lord every morning like I used to. First thing I do when I get up, is get me a cup of coffee, then go to my hiding place, my office right now...and before I turn my phone on, before I go to my computer, I don't even play music. I just sit quietly for a short time, like 10 minutes and meditate on God and try to think Good Things. Then I open my bible and read some scriptures: I am reading Psalm 101 through Psalm 130 this month. I study that Psalm for a time, dissecting it through and through. To see if I get anything specifically from God. And I do every morning!
At least I feel better! After 2 hours of sitting, reading, listening, and talking to the Lord, I am ready to get to my computer, play some music, and read my email and see what Facebook has to offer from my FB friends.
Hallelujah, I love Mondays....and the word I got yesterday was "believe" and "on the 3rd day you will get some good news".
I want to be a sanctuary for people and for God.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Lean on me, says the Lord.
I wonder why I quit writing this blog. Haven't written in it since February. I always liked the name of it. So this morning I have been thinking...why can't things be peaceful for a long time? Just when things seem to be going along, with nothing bad happening for my friends and family, boom! The earth shakes and things happen. So the moral of the story, is enjoy life, don't worry about tomorrow, because you don't know what is going to happen tomorrow. Just enjoy today!
So today I am praying for peace, joy, and happiness in this day for several people, and you know who you are. You are reaching out for strength, wisdom, and guidance....and you question what is God doing? Sometimes you don't understand why this is happening? But you know, sometimes God doesn't show you that. He says "Lean on me. Don't fret. I am your comforter and your friend."
Used to, when I was going through those years with Eddie who had Alzheimer's, I decided to not question why. I just lived for that day and didn't worry about what tomorrow would bring. I didn't want to know what tomorrow was going to bring. I had hope, though, that tomorrow was going to be good. That way I got through that day.
So, I would say to anybody that is going through this troubling time, Hope for Tomorrow!
Keep hoping. Don't give up!
But sometimes you can wish things were different, like right now I wish I could pray out loud for people, like I used to. Sometimes I feel so inadequate when I pray. My speech is so halted and I can't say what my brain tells me to pray. But I know the Holy Spirit will pray for me.
I know I am grateful to God for many things...like for this cool weather in July we are having, for the rain we going to have, and for my beautiful children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren, for having a home, and my health, and the ability to write stories and read, and my friends and there are so many blessings I can't even count them.
I am sad for my loved ones, who are going through hard times, health problems, employment problems, and relationship problems, and financial hard times. I ask God to lift them up and let them sing for joy. Picure is A new morning in Floresville.
So today I am praying for peace, joy, and happiness in this day for several people, and you know who you are. You are reaching out for strength, wisdom, and guidance....and you question what is God doing? Sometimes you don't understand why this is happening? But you know, sometimes God doesn't show you that. He says "Lean on me. Don't fret. I am your comforter and your friend."
Used to, when I was going through those years with Eddie who had Alzheimer's, I decided to not question why. I just lived for that day and didn't worry about what tomorrow would bring. I didn't want to know what tomorrow was going to bring. I had hope, though, that tomorrow was going to be good. That way I got through that day.
So, I would say to anybody that is going through this troubling time, Hope for Tomorrow!
Keep hoping. Don't give up!
But sometimes you can wish things were different, like right now I wish I could pray out loud for people, like I used to. Sometimes I feel so inadequate when I pray. My speech is so halted and I can't say what my brain tells me to pray. But I know the Holy Spirit will pray for me.
I know I am grateful to God for many things...like for this cool weather in July we are having, for the rain we going to have, and for my beautiful children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren, for having a home, and my health, and the ability to write stories and read, and my friends and there are so many blessings I can't even count them.
I am sad for my loved ones, who are going through hard times, health problems, employment problems, and relationship problems, and financial hard times. I ask God to lift them up and let them sing for joy. Picure is A new morning in Floresville.
Friday, February 14, 2014
The winter is past
After several weeks or months of cold, rainy, freezing weather, with cloudy skies, the last few days have warm, and sunny, temperatures in the 70s and 80's. I wonder what it means.
For lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.
12 The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of singing has come,
And the voice of the turtledove
Is heard in our land. (Song. of Songs 2:11,12)
Everything still looks dead and cold out there.
But there is hope for tomorrow.
We are enjoying watching the Winter Olympics this week. I really have gotten fond of the Americans on the teams! Those young people make me wish i was young again! And it made me think of the time I went with some friends to Boulder Colorado one December, to see a friend as a surprise for her birthday, her husband arranged it as a surprise. it was a fun week seeking out fun things to do in Boulder and then I stayed longer and Mary and I went walking in the snow storm several blocks behind their house, where there was a hill. Carrying sleds ...the round ones...and she dared me to go down the hill on that sled. I did it. It was so much fun, especially for an old lady like me...I think I was 67 that year! I will have to find the pictures she took of me!
So, I have pretty much staying home in the icy weather, but then I had to go to the doctor here, to the labs, then i had to go to the hospital for a mammogram and bone density tests, and to my dentist in San Antonio.
But that day it was cold and rainy, and I dreaded going but i did. I got home safe as you can see now! ha.
Last week we were so sad because my sister, Liz (or as I call her, Sis), passed away and we had her visitation on Friday night in San Antonio, and her funeral/celebration service Saturday in San Antonio. The only thing happy about it was I got to see my children Derek and Lil Red, and Kristi and Chuck, who I love so much, and don't get to see a lot.
I have been reading a lot of books, these days, I just got through reading The Blue Bottle Club, for the second time in 10 years. What a good book! I would recommend it to all my women friends and family and loved ones...It is not a love story, but a story of 4 teenaged girls putting their dreams of hopes for the future down on paper, then putting them in a blue bottle on Christmas Day, 1929, and hiding it in a crack up in the attic. They forget about it, mainly because of the Crash of Wall Street that happened later that year, and then all of them gradually went their separate ways...and then someone found the bottle in 1994, (a destruction crew that was demolishing the house then). and this girl...a reporter for the local TV station, was give the bottle by the worker and was fascinated by what she found when she found a way to open it and read all their desires and plans for the future, when the graduated. So she began to search for the women...after 65 years had past, she just prayed a few of them were still alive.
Wonderful story.
So today, I am going to try to see if I can talk to an old man, that my publisher wants me to do a story on, who is 90 years old, and an artist who studied art in Chicago many years ago..now lives in Floresville alone...right near our house. I need to get ready to go, make sure my tape player has batteries, and hope I find him home.
More later today!
For lo, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.
12 The flowers appear on the earth;
The time of singing has come,
And the voice of the turtledove
Is heard in our land. (Song. of Songs 2:11,12)
Everything still looks dead and cold out there.
But there is hope for tomorrow.
We are enjoying watching the Winter Olympics this week. I really have gotten fond of the Americans on the teams! Those young people make me wish i was young again! And it made me think of the time I went with some friends to Boulder Colorado one December, to see a friend as a surprise for her birthday, her husband arranged it as a surprise. it was a fun week seeking out fun things to do in Boulder and then I stayed longer and Mary and I went walking in the snow storm several blocks behind their house, where there was a hill. Carrying sleds ...the round ones...and she dared me to go down the hill on that sled. I did it. It was so much fun, especially for an old lady like me...I think I was 67 that year! I will have to find the pictures she took of me!
So, I have pretty much staying home in the icy weather, but then I had to go to the doctor here, to the labs, then i had to go to the hospital for a mammogram and bone density tests, and to my dentist in San Antonio.
But that day it was cold and rainy, and I dreaded going but i did. I got home safe as you can see now! ha.
Last week we were so sad because my sister, Liz (or as I call her, Sis), passed away and we had her visitation on Friday night in San Antonio, and her funeral/celebration service Saturday in San Antonio. The only thing happy about it was I got to see my children Derek and Lil Red, and Kristi and Chuck, who I love so much, and don't get to see a lot.
I have been reading a lot of books, these days, I just got through reading The Blue Bottle Club, for the second time in 10 years. What a good book! I would recommend it to all my women friends and family and loved ones...It is not a love story, but a story of 4 teenaged girls putting their dreams of hopes for the future down on paper, then putting them in a blue bottle on Christmas Day, 1929, and hiding it in a crack up in the attic. They forget about it, mainly because of the Crash of Wall Street that happened later that year, and then all of them gradually went their separate ways...and then someone found the bottle in 1994, (a destruction crew that was demolishing the house then). and this girl...a reporter for the local TV station, was give the bottle by the worker and was fascinated by what she found when she found a way to open it and read all their desires and plans for the future, when the graduated. So she began to search for the women...after 65 years had past, she just prayed a few of them were still alive.
Wonderful story.
So today, I am going to try to see if I can talk to an old man, that my publisher wants me to do a story on, who is 90 years old, and an artist who studied art in Chicago many years ago..now lives in Floresville alone...right near our house. I need to get ready to go, make sure my tape player has batteries, and hope I find him home.
More later today!
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